Being the Mascot

Everybody knows them. They spend their time by going around in huge costumes, entertaininh kids and making fun of furries. Some people like them, that's why they are on so many photos, without actually being seen. Others fear them, as (I quote) only creep would do such a thing. 

They are mascots and, more specifically, my last job. 

How to get a job like this? For me, it was through connections. Aunt of my friend works in Karolina, where was opening week for new attraction, and costumes never come with someone to wear them. 

I would have known that it's too good to be all fun and games. 200 czk per hour? I was able to cancel my plans for the week (to visit a zoo) and get Petra to go with me. By the end of the day, it really was that zoo experience, but from animal´s point of view. 

We met at Kája, and there already was a group of mascots to be. I had probably the most positive relationship with children, but I still didn't want to touch them. It makes me feel like sort of pervert when I work with kids, and my friends made fun of me because of this :D. I won by the end, as I got my own field of force in the shape of red angry bird. Maky was less fortunate, as she was touched a lot as a Minnie. 

We had schooling before getting our costumes. Sadly, I heard only two things – your skin can't show, and that you can't hold kids, as they might slip you. It really made me feel professional. 

Bird had back zip, which made it hard for me to do anything on my own. Somebody always had to help me, and not only with dressing, but also with walking. It came out that I can either walk or see in that thing :D. That hour I spent without companion, released into the wilderness of Karolina was one of the scariest experiences of my life. This is illustration of what I have seen. 

It was blocked vision or mobility. Later Maky led me, so it was safe, but I still feared stepping on some poor kid. And even with help, it was really tiring. Most of us had to spend hours in difficult poses, so our head wouldn't fall, or just because our costume made us. Daisy and Minnie were specially tailored, so any person wearing them had to walk like some damsel. 

 But it was worth it. Children were really happy, so were most of parents, and there was a bunch of foreigners, so we could feel like a delegation. Seeing Red bird bump into the column and the minion must be a strong memory. I think that bumping into the column or mysterious field of force was way funnier than any of the jokes I have ever even though of. And it wasn´t followed by awkard silence.

The funniest thing for me was when some boy hit Maky, and his father told him “Carefully, so you won't hit his willie. ” I started laughing so much it probably looked like I was having a seizure. 

The other side

We had breaks, according to the rush once or twice a hour. First day, it was held next to elevators and every time some kid walked in, we had to put on costumes really quickly. Second, we came back to our magical back area, with pauses being much longer. 

For the last pause, I left really memorably – confidentally and totally the wrong direction :D. Maky had to run for me. 

We ended night at Zrzavá Mary, where I burned myself with hot strudel. I felt like real raver when I was the only one with knowledge of bars and drinks. Unfortunately, even with my own head my orientation still sucks, so I got us lost a few times. Looks like I am not going to be a fearless leader ᕦ( ᐛ )ᕡ.

I slept at Petra´s house, so one would thought that getting up and going to work will be easier. It wasn´t, as my sister came too and we were up to one o´clock. I am real morning... bird? pidgeon? what do you say? :D so I had to be careful in order to not wake everyone up. Petra eat´s really specific healthy foods that you have prepare, so I got myself a cofee, which meant that I had nothing to my pills. It wasn´t very healthy weekend, as you can see. In fact, it felt almost as a cholesterol suicide, with amount of unhealthy baked goods I bought end even ate(!). 
There was less of us at Sunday, so I could switch my costume. I went for minion and it was great, as I am the exact size for it :D. 
Even kids started out really calm, but as the day progressed, some of them got violent. A group of them almost stripped me and Petra, my companion of the day. I got away, but had to come back, because you can´t really run in Woody from Toy Story. In movie, my heroic action will be played by Stallone or Lundgren.

But it at least looked good, unlike trauma inducing Shrek. 
After all, it was boring, which is maybe worse that physical uneasiness. Walking around, sometimes dancing, those aren´t really fullfilling tasks. (Coming from someone who spend summer at buffet and souvenir shop.)

Of course, even second night ended in the club. I felt like at Buffy or Boondock Saints, you can choose. They have like best Piña Coladas at Rio, which was voted by our democratic group. I really wanted to go home early, as it´s hard to catch a bus, but I and Petra missed tram, so we had to come back. Rest of the group already paid and wanted to move, so we went to Mary. I was the leader, again, and let me tell, I am probably the first person to even get lost on the way from Nádražní to Elektra. 

Hapilly, we got there, so it was cool. 

I like going out with friends, it makes me feel normal after lockdown and other problems. Or better, it makes me feel like I am alive, I think it´s rather normal to get drunk before the mall where I live :D. I wonder if other countries have teenagers fond of getting wasted in parks or at streets, too. 

What was your most unique job? And how did you get it?